My First Day
My first day refers not to my first day in The Destination, but as an Intern. Scoring some gainful employment for the summer is of course entirely relevant to my Year Abroad blog, because it will, of course, fund wine, coffee, journeys to new and exciting places, bribes to make French people like me and less important things. Like food. And a roof over my head.
It’s also relevant in that I’m kinda working in the office that is making my year abroad possible. Now there’s an incentive not to suck at my job.
I have been given a Project. All good Projects have capital P’s. And it involves Europe and the University (of The Shire) and everyone being friends. Which is nice. And I wear a suit and have my own desk and drink coffee. But I also have to do research. And at the end I will have created a Report. And it will be mine and it will be beautiful.
But sometimes we have Meetings. That ominous M serves to show you how I feel about not being quietly ignored to do my Project- in exactly the way I want to. I feel that my embryonic Project should be kept away from judging eyes, should it, after months of steadily getting bigger and more complicated, turn out to be a bit crap.
Putting me in a professional environment with people I hope to impress inevitably leads to me making somewhat of a tit of myself. I have an uncanny ability to create awkward moments. Usually by having to fight the urge to say what I want to say. Take the internal conversation I had in the ladies’ toilet (everyone silently talks to themselves- don’t pretend you don’t), which went a little like this:
“How awkward would it be if it was your boss in the cublicle?”
Boss promptly walks out.
“Do I smile? Is that weird? STOP SMILING.”
“BREAK THE TENSION! MAKE A BLADDER JOKE!”
“NO, HELL, DON’T MAKE A BLADDER JOKE!”
By which point I’ve lingered awkwardly for around 4 seconds and my boss is looking at me like the parent of a prodigy might amusedly study the one toddler who seems to enjoy eating crayons.
I’m not scared of culture shock. Social interaction has always baffled me.